Tuesday, January 22, 2008

The Ex Factor.


As you all know from previous posts, I have an ex-boyfriend. A major ex-boyfriend, considering the fact that we were together for 7 years. But I don't think I've ever mentioned my previous ex. He was my "thug love." The guy that got caught undressing me in my bedroom when I was 15, the guy that "borrowed" some of my checks and said he'd let me know when I should report them stolen. This was also the guy who gave me his entire semester's book of math homework to do two days before it needed to be handed in, and blamed ME when he didn't pass.

They say when it rains, it pours. And they were not lying. I received a random phone call from "thug love" one day last week. We talked it up, chatted about old times and WHAM!! He hit me with, "So when can I come visit you?" Huh? Really? Because I haven't seen you in 10 years. So I kind of tip-toed around the question and we concluded our conversation nicely.

THEN...
As I was saying bye to "thug ex," "Major Ex" beeps in. I'm thinking to myself Is today Ex's Day? (Which should totally be a day, if it already isn't.) So I click over, and tell him how weird it was that he called because I'd just gotten off of the phone with the other ex. I told him "thuggie" kept coming at me with his whole "second chance skit" and I wasn't feeling it. "Major Ex" asked if he was also guilty of the "SCS" when he calls me. Easily I replied, "Yeah." I don't know if he thought I would be so direct about it, but who cares. Then, as if I'd reeled him in with some sort of possibility bait, he starts going on about how people that were together as long as we were shouldn't just lose all communication. He wanted to see me. He still had love for me. Blah, blah. And for a second, just one, I found myself agreeing with what he was saying. What could be the harm in meeting for lunch? I mean, we were together for 7 long years. And we hadn't seen each other since we broke up. Why not?

**record scratch**
He has a girlfriend. It's not we couldn't be friends regardless, it's just that his motto is "Men and women can't be just friends." And there it was. I knew he wouldn't be telling his girl about our meeting and I didn't want to be the ex who was having secret meetings with her man. EW. That is sooooo not me.

Maybe he doesn't think we broke up fairly; maybe he feels I gave up too easily; maybe he thinks we should have never broken up. But I don't. That's why I don't call you, that's why I don't want to meet up with you, and maybe "Major Ex," just maybe, you need to try to make the relationship you're in better than the relationship you had with me.

To all of my exes: You are my ex for a reason. Believe that. I've learned my lesson.

6 comments:

BLESSD1 said...

Hey...good for you for not backtracking or falling into the same old trappings. Many of us make that mistake due to the familiarity we feel with an ex, forgetting that they are an ex for a reason. Great post!

Cokoa Chanel said...

Honey you know I made that mistake how many times with the same "Major Ex?" Learn from your girl.....

Jia TV said...

I agree with you...men are your ex for a reason....most definitely. I made the mistake of "going back" many times but the ending was always the same....

Jia TV said...

I agree with you...men are your ex for a reason....most definitely. I made the mistake of "going back" many times but the ending was always the same....

kuh reel yuh said...

yeah, time doesn't move backwards; neither should you.

the best art director in the world said...

So speaking of EX's how about your EX GROUP from portfolio center? I think I should quote you here. You said, "maybe he feels I gave up too easily; maybe he thinks we should have never broken up. But I don't. That's why I don't call you, that's why I don't want to meet up with you." Is that why you dont call us? Well this shit has to get done tracie mae. But seriously, it has to be done thursday. we wanna meet. and of course the word vag will come up at least once. This is probably not the most efficient way to reach you but we already called and I thought it would be slightly amusing.