My life update pt. 3

She called to tell me a huge tree fell on our house during a recent storm. It was actually good that she was at home because she was supposed to be out here in Atlanta for my biopsy, but I told her not to come. (Psychic again? No. My friend who's gone through it before said it wasn't "mama I need you" type of pain.)

The tree plowed through our house. So for a second, my house was a tree house. There were branches in my room and bathroom which is on the total opposite of the house where the tree fell. When I first got the news and after the MooMoo said she (and my doggies) were okay, I didn't worry. I just thought, geez, when it rains it pours in my life. But then later that week when temperatures dropped below freezing in Mississippi, I started to worry. My mom was freezing at night. My dogs were freezing too. There's nothing like looking up at the stars from your bedroom.

Eventually the tree was removed and a tarp was placed over the roof. Insurance is helping my mom pay for the roof rebuild, but now I don't know if I'll be able to pay for the rest of my school.

...it's never ending.

My life update pt. 1

I know it's been awhile since I've written something. I just haven't really been myself. The fun-loving, happy-go-lucky, always smiling Tracie hasn't been around lately. I've been going through a lot.

The main thing: Remember back when I wrote about my visit to Planned Parenthood? How it was the greatest pap visit EVER? Yeah, so I should've known something would go wrong. My pap smear results came back abnormal and after more testing it was clear that I had to have a cervical biopsy. I learned that I would need the procedure back in January (around the time school was just starting back) and I couldn't stop thinking about it. It didn't help that my mom told me that my grandmother found out about her cancer through an abnormal pap. It also didn't help that cancer runs through our family like crazy. My mind went all over the place. I thought, what if I'm the first young person in my family who gets it, what if after all these years of being on birth control pills I'll have to have a hysterectomy before I even get the chance to have any kids, what if...

The biopsy sucked. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Well, maybe my worst enemy. I still don't know my results (which probably sucks more than the biopsy itself). I haven't been able to focus 100% on school. My work has suffered and probably at the worst possible time. A time when people are looking at my work and really judging me. I mean really, judging me - all across, up and down.

But that, folks, is a different story.

We might have the same life, if you've ever...

1. Saved KoolAid points.

2. Pushed play on the VCR when your daddy told you not to and saw your first porn.

3. Put a twin mattress on your staircase, sat in a cardboard box, and slid down (the mattress is optional).

4. Ate at White Castle, a lot.

5. Tried to tell your parents the truth because you saw some kid on TV not get in trouble after telling the truth, only to find out that telling the truth doesn't work. That's when you came to the realization that TV life and real life are not one and the same.

6. Ran from gunfire every Sunday after the skating rink closed.

7. Gone to the skating rink just to dance in the middle of the rink, not to skate.

8. Cried when your mom and dad told you not to answer the door for ANYONE and 10 minutes later they knocked on the door, yelling for you to open it for them. Ooooohhhh, that's a mean trick, I can't wait to do it to my kids.

9. Worn a key on a shoestring around your neck. And lost it every other week.

10.Tasted snow salt (you know, that salt that you put down to clear your steps or your sidewalk of snow) and found out that table salt is better.