I'm on Twitter, too.

Okay, so I'm officially a twitterer.
Check me out.
Follow me.
Or whatever.

Is it just me...

Is it just me or have your relationships with your republican friends been smudged a bit? I have a couple of die hard republican friends who I feel a little weird around now. I don't know if it's their pure disgust for Obama versus my fondness of him that caused a rift. Then there's the whole thing about him being black. Like me. I'm not saying his race was the reason they didn't vote for him (but you never know). But maybe it's just the fact that you've found your friends, people that you chill with, drink with, laugh, and cry with, are so incredibly different from you.

You may start second-guessing what you actually have in common with them. And you could realize that you're only friends with them because they're nice and occasionally funny, and so are you.

As of right now, I just try to steer clear of political talk (which was extra hard to do around the election) when I'm around my republi-friends. I guess having friends that believe different things makes me diverse. Diverse with awkward friendships. urg.

Back off the wagon.

The Kool-Aid man is my dealer.
The Kool-Aid is my drug.

I had weened myself off of Kool-Aid several months ago because I was on the weight loss tip and needed to cut my sugar intake. But I couldn't dare throw those packets of powdered goodness away. Recently, I had absolutely nothing to drink and wasn't about to venture out into the Atlanta cold to purchase something. I thought about what I had at home. I had sugar and my kitchen faucet was working. And I had never forgotten about the Kool-Aid packets at the bottom of that drawer. The answer was right in front of me.

I hadn't forgotten my recipe. And the preparation all came back to me as if I'd never stopped making it. Hot water, so the sugar will dissolve. Tropical Punch and Lemonade blend. Fill a cup with ice to prepare for the both warm and cold first sip.

And oh, what a good first sip it was.
And a good second sip.
And all the following sips.
Until it was gone.
Not the cup, the pitcher.

And I made another. And another.
I haven't stopped making Kool-Aid since.

My name is Tracie. And I'm addicted to Kool-Aid.

I don't want to be famous.

Youtube is weird.
People think they know me.
People want to know me.
People recognize me when I'm out.
All because I talk about my life on the internet.
Wait.
When it's written like that, it doesn't sound so smart.
It sounds like something my mother would warn me not to do.
"Don't do that Tray, you never know who's watching you." My mom would say.
And she may be right.
I mean, I'm normal.
But that doesn't mean that some weirdo-maniac-stalker type person isn't out there in youtube-land falling in love with me.
And all my different hair-do's.
I've already had one semi-nice-but-also-strange guy call me his "cyber wife," uhm, what's your name? Because I don't know you and I never got my wedding ring.
I've had people try to get my address to send me "gifts."
I've had people recommend places and times and dates for me to go out to eat, probably because they were sitting there with knife and binding rope in hand.
I've had people try to offer me jobs on TV, all they needed me to do is meet them for an "interview."
I mean, don't get me wrong, I understand that I'm out there in the world now.
People tune into me. People miss me when I'm gone (or at least they say they do).
I have 2051 people who subscribe to my videos (as of Nov. 17th). And there's probably 2040 people subscribed to me whom I've never met in person.
I like making my videos.
But I don't want to be famous.
I don't want to be famous enough for people to want to sleep outside my house until they die. I don't want to be famous enough that my life isn't just my own anymore.
Can youtube do that?
You bet your life it can.

What's the skinny on me?

I wish I could look that happy on a scale.
I've been struggling with my weight since I can remember. I grew up on Jenny Craig food (because my mom was dieting, not me) and skim milk. And when my mom and I moved from Chicago to Mississippi, she started cooking a lot of things I just wouldn't eat. I can remember coming home from school one day and my mom was de-furring a DEER in our kitchen, that her husband had hit with his car (I think on purpose) on his way home. And if that doesn't make you want to live in Mississippi, try cooked squirrel and rabbit and ew, raccoon. Needless to say, when I got a car, any fast food place was where I was headed. So I fell into a fast food trap. I don't dislike any fast food. As much as I try. My least favorite place is Arby's, but if I went there I could find something I like easily.
In my family, there are the big women (me, one of my cousins, my mom, and my gramma) and the skinnies (everybody else). I guess I'm not as big as I used to be; I have dropped a pants size from this time last year. But I'm no where near where I want to be. Where I've resolved to be every New Year since I was 18. This weight thing has claimed so much of my life. I've tried everything, too. I guess the only thing I can to is keep trying.

Side note: Is it wrong that I have a pair of skinny jeans? heh.

History has been made. And I'm alive!!

What can I say?
How about WOOHOO! Or YAYYYYY! Or OMG!
Barack Hussein Obama has been elected the 44th president of these United States. I must admit when I voted for him, I felt proud. I think I even smiled a little bit, okay, a lot. I would've voted democratically no matter who had won the primary, but yeah, it felt great voting for an African American president in my lifetime. Here it is 6 days after the votes came in and I think I'm still in shock.

Just seeing the jubilation of people all across the nation on TV. Calling my mom and hearing her tear-filled testimony of how she'd learned the news. It's just more than anyone could've expected, I think. I don't ever remember time (since I've been on earth) that our country was so excited about the president we chose to elect. I swear this is gonna be a holiday. You know, just like how Washington and Lincoln used to have their own holidays before some hater lumped it all into President's Day.

I was talking to some of my old classmates from PC the other day and they brought up a GREAT point. One of them mentioned that Barack was initially Michelle Obama's intern. Michelle has some political/leadership experience of her own. So maybe Michelle should pull a Hillary and run for president after Barack has hopefully completed his 8 years. That would be AWESOME! Because then I could vote for both a black man AND a black woman for president in my lifetime. Boy, my grandkids are gonna get an ear-full. Heh.

My neck! My neck and my back!

It all happened so fast. Perhaps as all car accidents do.
Some pedestrian (or stupidestrian, as I like to call him) decided that it was a good idea to take a leisurely stroll across Howell Mill during rush hour. Not at a light, mind you, but at a randomly placed crosswalk in the middle of the street. (I blame the city of Atlanta for painting that there.) The van in front of me didn't see him crossing the street until it was almost too late, so he slammed on his brakes. Which, in turn, made me have to slam on my brakes. But thankfully, I stopped before I hit the van. Unfortunately, the guy behind me wasn't so lucky.

I finally had my first car accident.

And let me just say that Saturns ROCK! The other guy's car was all messed up. I mean broken headlight, scratched up everywhere, and what looked like a broken hood. My car, a lovely little Saturn VUE, had no dents, no scratches, no nothing really. I saw a little scrape and that was it. And I was fine, too. I instantly had a headache but I think it was from the stress of being in an accident. I told the guy I was okay and that we didn't have to exchange information, considering that his car was the messed up one. At first, he seemed as though he was trying to act like it was my fault. Saying stuff like, "Don't worry about it..." and "Thanks for pulling over." I'm thinking to myself, YOU HIT ME, BUMHOLE! Get over yourself! Geez. But anyway, I'm fine. My back is fine. My neck is fine. And some nachos that I had just purchased from Willy's were also fine. (I did the "Mom reach over and save the passenger" move.) YES!

I'm BAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!

Just an FYI.
Get at me dog!

Blog Postponed!

Until further notice.

You can, however, catch me Monday, Wednesday, and Friday on Youtube vlogging (that's video blogging for those not up on the new lingo).

Check out MY CHANNEL for the Friday Rap Up because I will not be posting those here anymore either.

Soon, I'll be back. Hopefully blogging about my job search.

Thanks for reading guys. Go watch my videos.

love,
traciemae

Friday Rap Up - Insomnia

Friday Rap Up - I paid my car off.

Friday Rap Up - I ain't do nuthin this week.

Friday Rap Up - TWA

I did it! My Big Chop.

Friday Rap Up - Oversleep

I overslept and missed a make-up class on Wednesday.
That pretty much sums up my week.

My life update pt. 3

She called to tell me a huge tree fell on our house during a recent storm. It was actually good that she was at home because she was supposed to be out here in Atlanta for my biopsy, but I told her not to come. (Psychic again? No. My friend who's gone through it before said it wasn't "mama I need you" type of pain.)

The tree plowed through our house. So for a second, my house was a tree house. There were branches in my room and bathroom which is on the total opposite of the house where the tree fell. When I first got the news and after the MooMoo said she (and my doggies) were okay, I didn't worry. I just thought, geez, when it rains it pours in my life. But then later that week when temperatures dropped below freezing in Mississippi, I started to worry. My mom was freezing at night. My dogs were freezing too. There's nothing like looking up at the stars from your bedroom.

Eventually the tree was removed and a tarp was placed over the roof. Insurance is helping my mom pay for the roof rebuild, but now I don't know if I'll be able to pay for the rest of my school.

...it's never ending.